Christmas cracker.....jokes

[Shiny]

i am sure as the big day draws closer we'll be all attentending Xmas parties ect....and on the 25th we'll all have the big Xmas feast and the xmas cracker with the sh!t cracker jokes....I'll start the ball rolling with one my misses got today at her works party....she actually thought this was funny....!!! but she was well p!ssed....

"Why don't Eskimo's lips stick together".....?????

Because they grit their teeth.....

Bad....really....bad....I am sure they can be many more added over the next few days...so feel free to add the worst cracker jokes ever...:clap:

 

[Anthony @ SCS]

What's the difference between snow men and snow women?

Snow Balls

 

[Shiny]

What did the snowman say to the other snowman..????

"erm...can you smell carrots"

 

[RealKidJoker]

Two monkeys in a bath, one goes

"Oooooooohhhh aaaahhhhhh ahhhhhhh"

2nd one says

"Told you you should've put more cold water in...."

 

[Dave B]

7 dwarves in a bath feeling happy

Happy got out

So then they were feeling grumpy

Not strictly a cracker joke that one

 

[Posh]

Man walks in a chip shop with a fish under his arm.

"Have you any fish cakes" he asks

"No" said the chippy.

"That's a shame" says the man

"It's his birthday"

 

[Posh]

Two blokes walking there dogs across a graveyard.

"Morning" says one

"No" says the other.

"Just walking the dog"