6 days to 6 hrs

[Dave B]

By his name Diwrnach i would say paddy land ..and i don't mean kilburn high road lol

Whenever i go to see family and people hear I'm from london i always get "would you know kilburn??"

 

[peter rogers]

hes bout 40 mile from me

i know where ur coming from @armagh27 as few years ago i donated a kidney and had someone looking after me and was hard to keep work going i had some help

i help u out as its the right thing to do help someone when most needed after all ur still going to need the money

 

[Dave B]

Top man peter

Not many decent people left in the world

 

[Ant]

Hi @armagh27 Just to offer my sympathies, that's a tough break for anyone! As everyone's saying Family's so important and I'm sure you'll be the rock your wife and son will need you to be. Everything else like work will sort itself out, just look at the friendly help and advice offered by everyone on here.

All the best for you and yours mate.

 

[Diwrnach]

Reason I asked was I wouldn't mind helping out a bit if close, but that's not close, at all lol

 

[seye]

I feel for you Armagh, my boy who has just turned a teenager was diagnosed with autism in may this year. Although he is on the high functioning end of the spectrum it is hard work at times. I've just recently started scaling back and have chose not to work at weekends anymore because it is in times like these you realise what is important. I am glad you mentioned it, I know its a cliche but it makes me feel that were not alone. We are all sending you thoughts of strength just now, things will work out mate.

 

[Pickingpaul]

I hope everything works out for you, as previously said, if you can get someone to do your round while u are unable then at least u will still have it when things pick up again.

I had someone working my round when i moved abroad for a couple of years and although he wasnt very gd and i lost some customers i still had most left who were happy to see me again. Maybe you can still clean a few here and there?

 

[windowsurfer]

Sorry to hear about your life being turned upside down, family does come first, they are the priority and its good you are getting trained to help your son out and your wife is getting the needed op on shoulder, hope you can cope with it all, stay on the forum for some soothing crazy stories

I do have an account of a worse week than you, a friends wifes, sister and husband had just started their holiday on the beach this morning in Tunisia, where everyone was getting shot, they had to run for it, people around them shot, managed to get to a hotel and get barricaded in and thankfully are now heading home on a plane, totally scary, crazy out of controlled world.

 

[seye]

I understand what you mean by this and is meant well but totally different situ and cant really be compared. But all the same really horrible situation my thoughts are with all families involved.

 

[Dave B]

Don't get me started on those fanatical nutters..i could be ranting all night and i need to sleep lol

 

[seye]

Don't get me started on those fanatical nutters..i could be ranting all night and i need to sleep lol

And when you start ranting davieboy is that 6am already.

 

[Danfire]

Sorry to read about your situation. I also have 2 teenage children with autism and aspergers. I second what others have said about carers allowance, disability living allowance will probably be replaced by pip if you apply, no doubt it will be more difficult to apply and will be worth less as I can't see Ian Duncan Smith/Tory party changing it for any other reason.

The biggest, most common hurdles that our family and friends in the same situation have faced has been school provisions. I have lost count of the amount of times we have been to tribunals and prepared case statements in preparation for tribunals only for the local authority to capitulate at the eleventh hour. They do it as a tactic to frustrate the process and try to intimidate parents into accepting a cheaper, non appropriate education. If you have a similar experience, get help and stick to your guns. I know some must lose but every parent I know that's fought for an appropriate education that ended up at tribunal won.

You may find a social worker useful. I was always worried and sceptical but ours has helped access respite and carers so we get the odd break.

Finally, take the courses if you want, you may find them useful as talking is good therapy but I predict you will end up knowing far more about your child's condition than the paid 'experts'.

Good luck and post back if you get any problems, seems there's a lot on here that have seen it, done it and have the t shirt so you could get some useful pointers.

 

[seye]

Just a quick note about disability living allowance I have learnt this week that pip only applies to over 16s and disability living allowance still the same for under 16s. The biggest lesson I have learnt so far is to see when a melt down ie what seems a major major temper tantrum but is actually a reaction to not being able to process thoughts and feelings a quick as we do there for brain gets over loaded and a melt down is the only way to vent and get rid of that frustration- my wife and I have learnt to see the onset and back off with what ever subject or task that is being undertaken so my son can just take a breather to process things and not feel overloaded what ever is taking place. Where as before we would not see this and we would keep going and the before you know it an explosion- and be prepared for some family members who don't understand to say they just need a skelpped backside, but they only see the outcome of the struggle that you and your child cope with every day.

 

[norm]

Just got a massive kick to the nuts wife has to go into hospital for emergency reconstructive surgery on her shoulder been waiting 4 years will be out of the game of life for 12 to 18 months and my 4 year old son was diagnosed with autism on Monday so I have to put myself down as sole carer so my job has had to take a back seat not sure in today's climate weather client's would wait that long as there's a big gap between 6 days work a week and only 6 hours also my favourite cousin who would help me out in times of need is going to OZ in 3 weeks and my bro in law who was out of work for 7 years has **** me not just got a job and to top it all of kids finish school over here in 5 days if poss can anyone beat that for a shite week lol.......

im sorry to hear armagh27 you have a lot on your plate now, hope things work out for you

 

[Dave B]

My wife works with the visually impaired and works closely in schools with the senco

If there is one thing i have learned is never be fobbed off and fight all the way for what you want for your kids

That is the only way we got a diagnosis and still having issues with the school sometimes as a couple of teachers don't believe in it all and seem to think they can bypass the procedures put in place and do what they want

Doesn't wash with us though

 

[seye]

The school did nothing for our son and were happy for him to go without an education for 8 months, we went to the head of education for our area who was supposed to be informed of his situation, needless to say she didn't know a thing. As soon as she found out she set up a meeting and things are starting to move forward. But you have to fight for everything. Our councils even have documentation that state that families in our situation will get support from the word go, didn't happen its shocking.

 

[Gavin]

My wife works with the visually impaired and works closely in schools with the sencoIf there is one thing i have learned is never be fobbed off and fight all the way for what you want for your kids

That is the only way we got a diagnosis and still having issues with the school sometimes as a couple of teachers don't believe in it all and seem to think they can bypass the procedures put in place and do what they want

Doesn't wash with us though

Your so right we have had to fight big big time! After 2 and a half years our son is finaly coming back to Cornwall. We had to go as far as involve local and national media and the health minister!

Sadly these services that are so called professionals are far from it and they very often don't know the laws they are bound by.

 

[Tuffers]

Your so right we have had to fight big big time! After 2 and a half years our son is finaly coming back to Cornwall. We had to go as far as involve local and national media and the health minister!
Sadly these services that are so called professionals are far from it and they very often don't know the laws they are bound by.

When is he due back Gav? Is everything in place yet?

 

[cheapncheerful]

er gav....its on channel four now kids in crisis...really good...

 

[Gavin]

When is he due back Gav? Is everything in place yet?

Yep everything in place now just waiting for offstead the check out the home and register it. Should be the 22nd of this month. /emoticons/biggrin.png

er gav....its on channel four now kids in crisis...really good...

Yeah we were asked to be part of that but chose not to as had so much media stuff we just want to get him back now and get on with our lives.

Just for others here I do have another site that may be of interest around autism. www.parentsautismforum.co.uk also at work I am working on a know your rights campaign which outlines the most important bits of law applying to autism, care etc so if anyone is interested I will post that in that site tomorrow. /emoticons/wink.png

 

[Dave B]

I am glad my son just has mild aspergers and not any further up the spectrum as this is hard enough to get the school etc to do anything

My thoughts are with any of you guys having to deal with it and the issues that arise