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latest employee -had to go

ECLM
WCF

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boarcity

this lad,well man, of 21 was onboard only a day annoyed me coughing in van without puttin hand over face . but i decided no,no im not going to be hasty, give him a chance

days passed,rolled into weeks- pickin flakey skin off his fingers , coughing and generally foul BUT good cleaning effort ,i thought hmm i can live with that

but then yesterday,he cut his hand on a thornbush,a really small cut perhaps 1 cm long but MY GOD its blood - he insisted his hand fully bandaged before carrying on work. i was amazed , he genuinely was revelling in "the injured worker "status and by time we went home had lost all feeling in his hand

anyhow this morning he fails to turn up for work. uh oh whats coming next . a possible compo claim?

9.30 a.m i get a phone call, hello mate,iv been up the hospital all night -with a TIGHT CHEST - but im allrite now can work

i knew,sensed hed simply slept in

fookin tight chest my arrrse

 
this lad,well man, of 21 was onboard only a day annoyed me coughing in van without puttin hand over face . but i decided no,no im not going to be hasty, give him a chancedays passed,rolled into weeks- pickin flakey skin off his fingers , coughing and generally foul BUT good cleaning effort ,i thought hmm i can live with that

but then yesterday,he cut his hand on a thornbush,a really small cut perhaps 1 cm long but MY GOD its blood - he insisted his hand fully bandaged before carrying on work. i was amazed , he genuinely was revelling in "the injured worker "status and by time we went home had lost all feeling in his hand

anyhow this morning he fails to turn up for work. uh oh whats coming next . a possible compo claim?

9.30 a.m i get a phone call, hello mate,iv been up the hospital all night -with a TIGHT CHEST - but im allrite now can work

i knew,sensed hed simply slept in

fookin tight chest my arrrse
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This reminds me why I don't employ, and I prefer my own company.

 
Don't worry about a compo claim mate, its not something you could have predicted or prevented. Sounded like a liability from the start tbh, so you are best shot of him. If I stopped work every time I cut myself I'd be fooked as its a weekly occurance for me.

 
Tight chest. Would be funny if you weren't on the receiving end. Suppose it's lucky he didn't 'fall off the ladder after sustaining hand injury' (lawyers for you . Com)

After this saga and the last numptie I hope you have better luck next time.

 
I will start recruiting again next month and on the advert it will simply read

'If you were born after 1985 do not waste your time applying'

I've had enough of the kids. Only hiring the family man that simply wants to put food on his table and enjoy a quiet pint at the weekend.

 
A family man with two or three days free would be a sturdy worker I'd imagine, or a lengthy trial period to sort the wheat from the chaff

 
make them sign an agreement stating they are solelly responsible for there own personal insurance if they want any,

they are working as self employed so they are liable for there own insurance etc

in other words they are working as self employed.

ohh and no nose picking,

butt raking out,

hands down pants stroking there ding a ling,

NO FARTING in the van:D:D:D

 
I will start recruiting again next month and on the advert it will simply read'If you were born after 1985 do not waste your time applying'

I've had enough of the kids. Only hiring the family man that simply wants to put food on his table and enjoy a quiet pint at the weekend.
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While I can understand the want for this, I would be careful voicing it in an advert. You might set yourself up for an age discrimination case.

I might have struck gold recently as I have a guy wanting to work with me that used to be a windy himself. Lives just round the corner, in his 40s stay at home dad, harmless sort. Seems a nice bloke as had a few chats with him now as I figure him out. Might start him out with the Christmas rush and see how he gets on.

 
in the new year i will recruit a new un. im prob wanting a 16/17 yr old who hasnt had time yet to get into being a waster . i want milk fresh out of the churn non of this sour yellow slop that iv been buying lately

 
You're going to need a minibus soon mate!
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erlier this year a salesman at the local peugeot dealer tried to sell me a 13 seater minibus they jus so happened to have in stock when i enquired about a little crew van "i can have it round to yours in 20 minutes..."

i said ,dont be daft itd be impossible to put the ladders on the roof

"oh theyd go inside " was his reply

 
erlier this year a salesman at the local peugeot dealer tried to sell me a 13 seater minibus they jus so happened to have in stock when i enquired about a little crew van "i can have it round to yours in 20 minutes..."i said ,dont be daft itd be impossible to put the ladders on the roof

"oh theyd go inside " was his reply
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I reckon a transit with a wooden bench on either side in the back. Picture the scene, everyday would be like a vietnam film with everyones at in the back of a Huey sat in silence chewing gum and waiting to enter the fight. When you stop at a job you can all bail out with military precision- 1 stops taffic, the other gets the ladder off. Another grabs all the belts n boabs.

I'm thinking about this too much.:oops:

 
make them sign an agreement stating they are solelly responsible for there own personal insurance if they want any
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You can use the paper that agreement is written on to wipe your a$$ Johnny - there is no court in the UK that will stand in as the government has already passed legislation (many years ago) making it compulsory for you to have employee liability insurance.

No way round it mate.

 
the lad/ man rang up today - "i thought id be honest with you,i havent got a good sleeping pattern and i slept in,wasnt up the hospital at all , can i have another chance i liked the job"

no way

 
the lad/ man rang up today - "i thought id be honest with you,i havent got a good sleeping pattern and i slept in,wasnt up the hospital at all , can i have another chance i liked the job"
no way
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What an idiot. You're right not to tolerate it. Not turning in this early in the day is not a good sign, but lying is even worse.

 
Couldn't stand being with someone 7 hours a day, 5 days a week. Think id land up strangling em. I have a worker that uses my other van and pays me a commission. The harder he works the more he earns. He has 3 kids, so don't have time off unless his practically dead

 

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