We've All Got Our Fruit Cakes But.....

Discussion in 'Chit Chat & Introductions' started by Tuffers, Sep 18, 2013.

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  1. Tuffers

    Tuffers Hero
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    This has to be the best ever. I got a phone call 5 weeks ago from a woman I kind of know. She said that her window cleaner was no longer cleaning the outside of her house, but was just cleaning the inside. I go along to quote it. I managed to get the price of the other cleaner. It was £50. Now this house is no way worth £50 and I said I'd do it for £35. She was chuffed and I was happy too. We arrange a date to clean and I wfp them. The other fella was clothing them. I reached windows he had never cleaned. We agreed a 4 weekly clean. I said that the next clean would be in 5 weeks as I was having a week off. I also asked her for the other windys number, thinking he may be retiring I could give him a bell and maybe pick up some more work. On the night of the clean I rang him. I explained that she rang me saying that he wasn't cleaning the outside any more. I asked if he was retiring. He said no, he just wasn't cleaning the outside, but just doing inside. Weird? He goes on to say that she is a nutter and a messer. Hmm me thinks, I'll just roll with it. He said that I had his blessing to do the work.

    Anyway, I rang her today to book her in. No answer. My phone rings this afternoon. Who is this she asks, It's me Tuffers, is that Mrs so&so I ask. Yes what do you want she asks. I was just calling to book you in for a clean I say. Oh she says, they were cleaned yesterday. Oh, I say, I thought I was your window cleaner now. Well I haven't heard from you in ages she says. I say, well I did say it would be 5 weeks. Who cleaned them I ask. I don't know, there was a man in my garden when I got home yesterday and he was cleaning the windows. Do you know who it was I ask. I haven't got a clue who he was and my property was all locked up she says. Did you pay him I ask. Yes I paid him £50. I say, so you pay someone who you've never met before who is in your garden cleaning your windows £50. This is the funny bit, she says, but he did a very good job with no smears.

    That was it for me, I said keep your new window cleaner I'm no longer interested and put the phone down on her.

    A simple deduction tells me the old windy or a mate of his cleaned them and the woman is stark raving bonkers!

    Nowt queerer than folk :Image3:
     
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  2. mark m

    mark m Hero
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    Another great story Tuffers :Image3:
     
  3. Tuffers

    Tuffers Hero
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    It's always me aint it! :Image13:
     
  4. norm

    norm Grand Master
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    :Image2: she is a sandwich short of a picnic
     
  5. Dodger

    Dodger Hero
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    haha thats a classic Tuffers.
     
  6. Dodger

    Dodger Hero
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    Dodgy window cleaner nicked it lol
     
  7. Jack09

    Jack09 Newcomer
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    Haha,

    We've all had 'em

    One of my regulars phoned me at 5:54am.
    "Hello jack, any chance you can come round and clean my windows this week?"

    Ok no probs. so I made may way round there the next morning after dropping my boy of at school.

    I knock the door at 9:45.

    "Morning. I've come to clean your windows"

    "Oh, jack. Your very early, you got me out of bed!!!"

    P**s taker
     
  8. Andykarlaxxx

    Andykarlaxxx Forum Addict
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    Point for that mate, lovely little novel by tuffers,k,rowling
     
  9. Smurf

    Smurf Banned
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    I had a lady try call me this morning as she thought I was going to clean her windows this morning as called my home number but was out working. Then wife tried getting hold of me but I did not pick the message up until 2.30pm when I had finished a job.

    Funny thing was she calls me when she wants them doing about every six weeks. Last week due to bad weather (high winds and heavy rain) I reappointed the job to the following morning. I then get a phone call her saying the forecast looks like it's going to rain so can you do it on Friday instead. So I looked in my diary and said yes but will be after 2pm on Friday as have other work booked so will you be home in the afternoon. Lady replied oh yes we will be in all afternoon. Great I said I will give you a call around 2pm on Friday when I'm on my way. Lady said great see you then. Even wrote in my diary as she agreed Friday after 2pm would be fine.

    Now when I tried calling her to let her know I was on my way there was no answer. So I then left a message saying was just letting you I was going to be on my way but obviously you’re not home so will give you a call this evening.

    Calls her this evening and she said I waited in all morning but you never turned up. I then said we agreed and I ever wrote it in my diary I would call you about 2pm to let you know I was on my way and by the way I did phone you and left a message on your answer phone so did you get it. She replied no I did not get the message because I was out

    To top it off we then arranged it now for this coming Monday morning about 10am and she said you’re going to turn up this time I hope. Was so tempted to say let’s just forget it but didn't as bless her she is in her 80's
     
  10. nwcs

    nwcs Forum Addict
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    I had 1 years back that had me cleaning her tops and another window cleaner doing her bottoms...
     
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