Welcome to the UK Window Cleaning Forums

Starting or own a window cleaning business? We're a network of window cleaners sharing advice, tips & experience. Rounds for sale & more. Join us today!

Couple of bizarre ones from yesterday

HWCS

Well-known member
Messages
1,130
Location
North Norfolk
Just lost my first one due to WFP (ironically not my wfp)

"Jon dont bother coming back unless your going to clean my windows the proper way, they are in a right mess, looks like you done them with a pole and brush, my neighbours also said she doesnt want hers done like that anymore either"

"Sorry Mrs Payne, but im confused as ive not done your windows since the 5th November"

"Well who came yesterday and did them?"

"No idea but it wasnt me as im due to come to yours next week, and for the record I DONT DO YOUR NEIGHBOURS WINDOWS"

"Well somebody did them yesterday"

"Not me, were the windows ok, after i came on 5th November"

"Yes they were fine"

"Well i cleaned them using a wfp system, i think maybe your neighbours cleaner did hers yesterday and did yours aswell but didnt do it right"

"Well if thats how your doing them now i dont want you back"

FML you cant argue with stupidity!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------

Had a bizzare customer yesterday!!!

Moaned that im now WFP and he wasnt informed.

Moaned that i said id be round roughly 10th december but turned up on the 5th

Moaned that i was there at 8.30am as i shouldnt be going to peoples houses before 9am

Moaned that i was cleaning OUTSIDE while his mums carer was inside.

Then gives me a £5 xmas tip and a bottle of wine ?????

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Its the time of year they all go bonkers. As long as my windows were clean, I really wouldnt care.

I think some people are too far removed from doing them thereseĺf. They have forgot what a chore it was for them with there glass cleaner and cloth. The hour or so of hard elbow grease. Then the streaks, smears. All the **** like paint specks that was left unchecked. How acceptable it was, when it was there sweat and hard work.

A few years of having a window cleaner, and they turn into the hotel inspector.

 
Just lost my first one due to WFP (ironically not my wfp)

"Jon dont bother coming back unless your going to clean my windows the proper way, they are in a right mess, looks like you done them with a pole and brush, my neighbours also said she doesnt want hers done like that anymore either"

"Sorry Mrs Payne, but im confused as ive not done your windows since the 5th November"

"Well who came yesterday and did them?"

"No idea but it wasnt me as im due to come to yours next week, and for the record I DONT DO YOUR NEIGHBOURS WINDOWS"

"Well somebody did them yesterday"

"Not me, were the windows ok, after i came on 5th November"

"Yes they were fine"

"Well i cleaned them using a wfp system, i think maybe your neighbours cleaner did hers yesterday and did yours aswell but didnt do it right"

"Well if thats how your doing them now i dont want you back"

FML you cant argue with stupidity!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------

Had a bizzare customer yesterday!!!

Moaned that im now WFP and he wasnt informed.

Moaned that i said id be round roughly 10th december but turned up on the 5th

Moaned that i was there at 8.30am as i shouldnt be going to peoples houses before 9am

Moaned that i was cleaning OUTSIDE while his mums carer was inside.

Then gives me a £5 xmas tip and a bottle of wine ?????


That's just mental lol. Some idiot cleaned her windows for free (badly) and you're due next week to clean them. They'll be right as rain after your clean. What's the problem?!

 
Just lost my first one due to WFP (ironically not my wfp)

"Jon dont bother coming back unless your going to clean my windows the proper way, they are in a right mess, looks like you done them with a pole and brush, my neighbours also said she doesnt want hers done like that anymore either"

"Sorry Mrs Payne, but im confused as ive not done your windows since the 5th November"

"Well who came yesterday and did them?"

"No idea but it wasnt me as im due to come to yours next week, and for the record I DONT DO YOUR NEIGHBOURS WINDOWS"

"Well somebody did them yesterday"

"Not me, were the windows ok, after i came on 5th November"

"Yes they were fine"

"Well i cleaned them using a wfp system, i think maybe your neighbours cleaner did hers yesterday and did yours aswell but didnt do it right"

"Well if thats how your doing them now i dont want you back"

FML you cant argue with stupidity!!!

--------------------------------------------------------------

Had a bizzare customer yesterday!!!

Moaned that im now WFP and he wasnt informed.

Moaned that i said id be round roughly 10th december but turned up on the 5th

Moaned that i was there at 8.30am as i shouldnt be going to peoples houses before 9am

Moaned that i was cleaning OUTSIDE while his mums carer was inside.

Then gives me a £5 xmas tip and a bottle of wine ?????
Without customers it would be a pretty boring job. ?

If the carers had been that concerned they would have closed the curtains.

Please wasn't with me the other day. 

" Oh, I see you are on your own today. Is your son not working with you today?"

" No Mrs G, I'm sorry but you are going to have to put up with me today."

"It takes you much longer to clean the windows when you are on your own." (Revelation - didn't realise that. ?)

"I'm sorry, but I'm old and decripid and I'm the one who hinders progress. The older I get the better I was."

She looked a little confused and retreated inside to open the garage door for access around the back.

I smiled the way through the job wonding how long it took her to figure it out.

 
That's just mental lol. Some idiot cleaned her windows for free (badly) and you're due next week to clean them. They'll be right as rain after your clean. What's the problem?!
In the early days we had a street house to clean a few houses in from the corner. Front from the street and back via the back lane. Clean the front and carefully count the number of doors back to the corner.

Then translate that around the back. Go in and clean the backs. Once finished pack everything back into the van and knock on the front door for the money. 

" You haven't finished, you haven't cleaned the back."

"Yes I have." 

"No you haven't as I watched you clean the house next door." 

I cracked up with laughter. "Why didn't you come out and tell me?"

" Because you were cleaning then so enthusiastically that I didn't want to stop you." 

Some 12 year on we still clean that house but we never got the neighbours I accidently cleaned.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
In the early days we had a street house to clean a few houses in from the corner. Front from the street and back via the back lane. Clean the front and carefully count the number of doors back to the corner.

Then translate that around the back. Go in and clean the backs. Once finished pack everything back into the van and knock on the front door for the money. 

" You haven't finished, you haven't cleaned the back."

"Yes I have." 

"No you haven't as I watched you clean the house next door." 

I cracked up with laughter. "Why didn't you come out and tell me?"

" Because you were cleaning then so enthusiastically that I didn't want to stop you." 

Some 12 year on we still clean that house but we never got the neighbours I accidently cleaned.


I believe this is whats happened.

Their is a real cowboy splash n dash outfit round here that will travel 30miles to do £50 worth of work, they have absolute tricked out top notch vans, but clearly dont use pure water, (they used to do my neighbours).

The owner runs one van, and the other van in about a year of doing my neighbours had a different worker EVERY clean.

Im assuming they do my EX customers neighbour and just didnt look at the number and did the wrong house first and then realised the mistake and done the right one.

Fkd it all up, and left me 1 £17 customer down.

 
I believe this is whats happened.

Their is a real cowboy splash n dash outfit round here that will travel 30miles to do £50 worth of work, they have absolute tricked out top notch vans, but clearly dont use pure water, (they used to do my neighbours).

The owner runs one van, and the other van in about a year of doing my neighbours had a different worker EVERY clean.

Im assuming they do my EX customers neighbour and just didnt look at the number and did the wrong house first and then realised the mistake and done the right one.

Fkd it all up, and left me 1 £17 customer down.
As frustrating as it is I don’t think it’s the other window cleaners fault. It’s pretty bonkers for a customer to drop you when you explained it wasn’t you, and can prove they are pleased with your quality of work. Sorry man, it sucks but maybe it was gonna happen at some point, this was just the excuse for them?

 
This is my first winter doing WFP, picked up several new customers in recent weeks which I found surprising to say the least, then lost a long term customer yesterday for no apparent reason.

she said " can we quit cleaning from this point on?" 

I said yes of course but can I ask why? 

" you do a good job but I just want to stop having them done, no other reason"

moneys tight perhaps? 

Had a couple of messers too past two days, one I expected as he seems to pick and choose his months to clean. The other hasn't had it done since October and whinced at my £10 price tag when quoted (8 sets of windows front,back and side plus a medium con). Think she's been told to curb her spending by the husband, both of which argue right in front of me! 

Lets see what January brings!

 
I got my £5 fronts only job today.. literally 2 front windows, a tiny one by the door and the door itself. Used to do their neighbour who loved messing me about..

Anyway time before last she told me to let he know when i was putting my prices up. I could sense she was looking for a get out of jail excuse.. i just said I wasn't going to. She looked glum.

Last time i called the evening before and said i'd be there the next day.. she sounded panicky.. but i still got paid

Then yesterday i called them and spoke to him and said it's the window cleaner.. his reply was "ohhhh.... riiiiggghhhttttt.... " as if "oh we still got your burden have we" kind of attitude. I said i'd be round tomorrow (today) and he just said okay lol. I suspect i'll get binned by them today too but at least it's only a tiny amount although the easiest money ever...

 
In the early days we had a street house to clean a few houses in from the corner. Front from the street and back via the back lane. Clean the front and carefully count the number of doors back to the corner.

Then translate that around the back. Go in and clean the backs. Once finished pack everything back into the van and knock on the front door for the money. 

" You haven't finished, you haven't cleaned the back."

"Yes I have." 

"No you haven't as I watched you clean the house next door." 

I cracked up with laughter. "Why didn't you come out and tell me?"

" Because you were cleaning then so enthusiastically that I didn't want to stop you." 

Some 12 year on we still clean that house but we never got the neighbours I accidently cleaned.


Had a similar thing happen earlier this week only the outcome was different.

As I was cleaning the 'wrong' house the householder, a friendly older lady came to the door and said she hadn't booked my services. When I explained that my services had been requested over the back garden fence by another lady on my last visit to her neighbour she looked pleased and said it must have been her daughter in law.

However, shortly thereafter I realised I had been in the back garden of the neighbour the other side of hers when the request was made, and as a consequence instead of cleaning no.25. I'd cleaned no.21. I had written the wrong number down the previous month and not realised it.

I went back to do the right one and called at the wrong one to explain my mistake. I gave the right one a good laugh and gained a new customer at the wrong house.

Not a method I recommend for gaining new customers but it worked in my favour this time. No telling yet whether this new 'wrong' one will last of course. She seemed grateful that she now had clean windows and frames but only time will tell I guess. 

 
This is my first winter doing WFP, picked up several new customers in recent weeks which I found surprising to say the least, then lost a long term customer yesterday for no apparent reason.

she said " can we quit cleaning from this point on?" 

I said yes of course but can I ask why? 

" you do a good job but I just want to stop having them done, no other reason"

moneys tight perhaps? 

Had a couple of messers too past two days, one I expected as he seems to pick and choose his months to clean. The other hasn't had it done since October and whinced at my £10 price tag when quoted (8 sets of windows front,back and side plus a medium con). Think she's been told to curb her spending by the husband, both of which argue right in front of me! 

Lets see what January brings!


I'm afraid you won't always get a straight answer when customer's cancel your service.

I think I have only ever had one admit that she was cancelling as she was skint.

One was having new windows fitted - 14 years on and no new windows were ever fitted to that house.

One was selling up and moving out the area, only to find them in a new estate down the road. They did look like rabbits caught in the headlights.

Another was having an extension built so would advise us to continue when the work was complete. It was only later I found out that they didn't own the house; it was rented. They later moved out and the house was put up for sale by the owner - who lived next door and whose house we also clean.

One had a water streak from a front window 2 cleans ago - which was strange because we would have noticed it when we collected. No mention was made of it on collection night either which was a couple of days after we cleaned them.

You didn't clean the back windows because his gate was bolted. I'll pay you half and don't come back again. My lad headed to the van to get the steps out to show him how he opened the gate but I could see it was going to get nasty. I got the feeling that this guy was on drugs.

"I can assure you we cleaned the back, but we will accept what you give us and that the service is cancelled. Thank you for your custom."

As we were leaving I called out to my lad in earshot of our ex customer that "just because someone says something doesn't mean its true. Please don't take it personally."

There's an old Yorkshire saying, "there's now't so queer as folk." In this job we have to maintain a sense of humour and become teflon coated.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
I'm afraid you won't always get a straight answer when customer's cancel your service.

I think I have only ever had one admit that she was cancelling as she was skint.

One was having new windows fitted - 14 years on and no new windows were ever fitted to that house.

One was selling up and moving out the area, only to find them in a new estate down the road. They did look like rabbits caught in the headlights.

Another was having an extension built so would advise us to continue when the work was complete. It was only later I found out that they didn't own the house; it was rented. They later moved out and the house was put up for sale by the owner - who lived next door and whose house we also clean.

One had a water streak from a front window 2 cleans ago - which was strange because we would have noticed it when we collected. No mention was made of it on collection night either which was a couple of days after we cleaned them.

You didn't clean the back windows because his gate was bolted. I'll pay you half and don't come back again. My lad headed to the van to get the steps out to show him how he opened the gate but I could see it was going to get nasty. I got the feeling that this guy was on drugs.

"I can assure you we cleaned the back, but we will accept what you give us and that the service is cancelled. Thank you for your custom."

As we were leaving I called out to my lad in earshot of our ex customer that "just because someone says something doesn't mean its true. Please don't take it personally."

There's an old Yorkshire saying, "there's now't so queer as folk." In this job we have to maintain a sense of humour and become teflon coated.
Comparing your experience to mine makes me wonder if there’s another forum where these people go to swap excuses on how to get rid of their window cleaners. I’ve had pretty much all the same excuses or close variants of them over the years 

 
The other hasn't had it done since October and whinced at my £10 price tag when quoted (8 sets of windows front,back and side plus a medium con). Think she's been told to curb her spending by the husband, both of which argue right in front of me!
Not these two is it ?

download (2).jpg

 
Not these two is it ?

View attachment 18534


They wish they looked that healthy and wealthy @Iron Giant haha. They slang each other off in front of me every time I go to clean, wher do I put my face??? Her sister (who has got me a fair few customers now) is the total opposite. Dropped a Christmas card off last weekend, went to clean this week and got a fiver tip and a handwritten card back off her, a posh one too. She lives in a £6 bungalow and keeps chickens, always trying to off load eggs haha.

i should do a trade eggs for honey as I keep bees ?

 
They wish they looked that healthy and wealthy @Iron Giant haha. They slang each other off in front of me every time I go to clean, wher do I put my face??? Her sister (who has got me a fair few customers now) is the total opposite. Dropped a Christmas card off last weekend, went to clean this week and got a fiver tip and a handwritten card back off her, a posh one too. She lives in a £6 bungalow and keeps chickens, always trying to off load eggs haha.

i should do a trade eggs for honey as I keep bees ?
I would definitely do a trade with the honey, I hope to get set up and have my own bees in the next year or so down our allotment 

 
Back
Top