More funny messer stories to keep us warm this winter

[Dino]

Nowt as queer as folk.

Second clean of a new customer.  First clean no issues, bloke paid up and was happy with service.  Met us face to face, had the full service explained and opted for clean every 4 weeks.  I have had my fair share of messers so I just take it on the chin now and move on, but this guy was a class act.  Owed a tenner, we let it ride for 2 weeks then sent a text reminder, nothing nada, 3 texts later, 1 telephone call and an email all for a £10, no response.  Now we gave this bloke the benefit of the doubt and assumed he was on holiday.  However, we spied him at his house yesterday when we were out.  So we knocked on his door which he opened and we said "hello, just come to collect for the last window clean we assumed you might have been away as we have tried to get in touch".  He looked us up and down and grimaced like we were something he had found on his shoe and responded "Do I know you?  Please don't come knocking on my door asking for money, charity starts at home".  He then shut the door in our face.  Has anyone ever been treated like this before?  We are pretty thick skinned but this bloke is a blatant nut job and taking huge liberties.  If I could be bothered I'd take it to the small claims court but to be honest I can't be arsed.  If you got a similar story, please share.  Some humans are just are not very human, makes me sick to my stomach that people like this exist.  There is no way he didn't know it was a regular service he had signed up for.  I've run out of eggs or this fella would certainly be getting decorated for christmas.

 

[windowsurfer]

Maybe a chancer if he is older,might be a sign of dementia? Very annoying if he is just acting up.

 

[Part Timer]

Mine's not a messer, had an old dear stop us whilst cleaning some flats in Cambridge asking how much we would charge her. My son was talking to her and asked with a sheepish look how much will we charge. She had 4 tiny windows out the front and I assumed the same out the back. I said minimum price is a tenner. She looked surprised and said per window so I replied no for all of them. Great she said  can you do them so I said ok. I then found out it was only the 2 top front windows and 1 back one

 

[Dino]

The guy is in his 30s and as sharp as a button.  He is a professional photographer.  Certainly not someone who falls into the vulnerable category.

 

[windowsurfer]

Fair enough just call back or just leave a payment slip again if u can be bothered. 

 

[ks789]

The guy is in his 30s and as sharp as a button.  He is a professional photographer.  Certainly not someone who falls into the vulnerable category.

 an egging job for sure in that case. 

 

[kevinc250]

I live in quite a small town so everybody knows each other, I just normally tell the neighbours that so and so haven't paid and leave it at that, still won't get my money but at least the neighbours know what he's like revenge is sweet

 

[ks789]

 an egging job for sure in that case. 

Mind you, I guess egg could be dodgy. i once went back to a non payers after giving up and rubbed all filthy cloth all over the upstairs window. Maybe a water pistol filled with muck water or something is easier.?

 

[dmw]

The guy is in his 30s and as sharp as a button.  He is a professional photographer.  Certainly not someone who falls into the vulnerable category.

Disgusting way to be treated, I wouldn't get mad over it, but if he is a professional photographer and self employed I might be inclined to send him on a wild goose chase across town to talk about a phantom wedding appointment.

 

[Pjj]

Nowt as queer as folk.

Second clean of a new customer.  First clean no issues, bloke paid up and was happy with service.  Met us face to face, had the full service explained and opted for clean every 4 weeks.  I have had my fair share of messers so I just take it on the chin now and move on, but this guy was a class act.  Owed a tenner, we let it ride for 2 weeks then sent a text reminder, nothing nada, 3 texts later, 1 telephone call and an email all for a £10, no response.  Now we gave this bloke the benefit of the doubt and assumed he was on holiday.  However, we spied him at his house yesterday when we were out.  So we knocked on his door which he opened and we said "hello, just come to collect for the last window clean we assumed you might have been away as we have tried to get in touch".  He looked us up and down and grimaced like we were something he had found on his shoe and responded "Do I know you?  Please don't come knocking on my door asking for money, charity starts at home".  He then shut the door in our face.  Has anyone ever been treated like this before?  We are pretty thick skinned but this bloke is a blatant nut job and taking huge liberties.  If I could be bothered I'd take it to the small claims court but to be honest I can't be arsed.  If you got a similar story, please share.  Some humans are just are not very human, makes me sick to my stomach that people like this exist.  There is no way he didn't know it was a regular service he had signed up for.  I've run out of eggs or this fella would certainly be getting decorated for christmas.

Applicator in a muddy puddle works a treat ???? 

 

[scottish cleaning service]

We usually pass on the info to other cleaners or handyperson so no one will do any work for them. I have one near me and he has went through 4 window cleaners. Same scenario and it was over buttons but its in his dna. I had one a few months ago, I did her gutters and first clean because she would be my monthy customer. After two weeks she cancelled. I can't wait for her to text me again as I have my reply ready which goes like this. "Sorry, don't work for people like you." and if she asks why, i'll reply "Timewasters"

 

[Bart90]

I had a weird one recently. Phoned up, very keen to ask me how I'd get to the skylights.  Turned up the same day, nice enough lady & she showed me the skylights from the inside (too far up the roof to reach from outside).  Showed her how i'd do them just by flipping them - she hadn't realised you could do that.  So I chatted for a while and she mentioned how she ordered special window cleaning spray online as the insides were bad for smearing and this product worked well.  Didn't think much at the time but after it made more sense.  She signed up as regular.  Went and did the job, said she'd pay by bacs.  Left the windows great.  No bacs payment after 3 days.  On the Saturday, get a cheque through the post..  "Thank you for cleaning windows but i don't require your services again".  

Baffled, I concluded she only wanted a window cleaner because of the skylights, she's completely OCD (who orders in window cleaning spray?) and i did myself out of a job the moment i showed her they flip.  Some people are quite frankly rude and far from straight forward to deal with.  That's people for you. Thankfully the good massively outweigh the bad!

 

[ksp]

I had a guy who wanted an 8 weekly clean. As I was finishing he asked if I could clean the UPVC. I said to him that It would cake the windows again but I’ll do it all on the next clean in 8 weeks. 
 

8 weeks later I knock to do the work. He opens the door, has a go at me then shut the door in my face. I’m sure that was dementia though. 

 

[Tango]

I've run out of eggs or this fella would certainly be getting decorated for christmas.

Nearly choked on my drink when i read that lol

Applicator in a muddy puddle works a treat ???? 

No finger prints that way too lol.

@Dino if a client is about and wanting to be invoiced i'll always get them to sign it, leave them the original and keep the CC safe. Had one try to wriggle on a £30 job recently, ended up sending a photo of the invoice with their signature on it via sms and then found myself getting paid. Might also be handy to get a signature on a very basic service agreement too - no super strict terms like a weeks cancellation (people hate signing all that stuff) but just something basic that shows how many week intervals the client wants, the cost and the payment methods. Get a signature off them on it and you're backside is covered for future invoices that you leave. Also before / after photos might be useful just in case of any legal proceedings / proof of work. 

 

[Rickadoo]

Ive got one we called to clean this week and she’s only gone and left a ceramic plant pot behind the solid wooden back gate to stop the wind blowing it. So when I push the gate open the plant pot falls over and smashes. Customer comes out...”Oh..You’ve broken that!!”,   “Yeah sorry, it was left behind the gate.”,   “It was my fathers.”  I felt like saying “well don’t prop your gate shut with heirlooms then.” She then commented on how we don’t dry the windows anymore and her friend from down south gets her windows dried off her windy. We have been wfping them for 7 years now and it’s the first time she’s mentioned it. Lol. And to make it all worse she also thinks I’m a (interest free) bank and only pays me after it mounts up to three cleans. ?

 

[Robbo]

Did a first clean on an old couple's bungalow, all went well.

Turns up 8 weeks later and the conversation went like this:

'Hi it's Pete the window cleaner, come to do your windows'

'I don't know who you are'

'I cleaned your windows 8 weeks ago, do you remember?'

'No I don't, i'll get my wife'

She doesn't remember me either! I'm thinking dementia, but one last shot...

'No problem, the last time I was here, I left you my leaflet and it has a picture of me on it'

'Do you have the leaflet?'

I don't remember ever having a leaflet....

Ho Hum!

 

[brianbadonde]

And to make it all worse she also thinks I’m a (interest free) bank and only pays me after it mounts up to three cleans. ?

You should tell her you have an arrangement with the bank: they don’t clean windows and you don’t do credit!