water fed pole backpacks

[spruce]

This is a big shame. I wasnt a great son, although I tried to be better at close to the end of my parents lives. Theres not a day go by I dont regret being better for them, black sheep that i was. 

I think this is a big club. I'm also a member of that club.

I think is only in later life that I've realised why there was such a chasm between myself and my parents. I never understood why my younger brother was the favourite. Unfortunately, I didn't have the best start. My elder brother was stillborn and I now understand how difficult it was for Mom carrying a second child (me) with this constant worry that I could also turn out a stillborn. When my brother came along she would have felt more relaxed during her pregnancy as I turned out OK. But she never 'bonded' with me.

This perceived favouritism was a major issue in my young life. I'm at peace with it now.

.

 

[Tango]

Unfortunately for me he has learnt to play the game and generally has his mother's backing. I've always told her that he is lazy but she won't have it. Somehow its always because of me that he's the way he is.

For example, at one time my car was always fastidiously clean and the kids were never allowed to eat and drink in it. He always said that this restriction was very unfair and he would never subject his kids to this cruelty. His car is a tip. The grandkids eat and drink and leave a mess. But the wife blames me for being too strict on our children for his attitude today.

But the first thing the wife does is ban the grandkids for eating in her car.

We went away to Cape Verde for a week our 45th wedding anniversary in March. He was given a list of jobs to do in our absence. He didn't do any of them - he did nothing for that week.

I asked him what he will do with our business when I can't work any longer. Nothing he says..

Women are funny creatures towards us men as soon as they become mothers. I can't do anything right anymore either. I feel your pain with your son, he's clearly got the wrong attitude and he's backed up by your wife who will never see any fault with him just because he is her son.

If he thinks doing nothing will work for him then maybe you should give him that chance early? - Tell him you're working by yourself or something for the next 3 months and see how he copes then once his income has dried up along with his ability to "leave it to dad to deal with".

I knew a kid like that years ago, lazy sod he was but worse he didn't believe in earning his own crust of bread, instead he'd just keep borrowing from people all the time. In the end no matter how fun he could appear to be everyone got sick of him and his bad attitude.

 

[Davy G]

If only we could all start our lives with a user's guide to how to live it, written and added to by the wisdom of each previous generation. Instead, we all have to start from scratch as babies, knowing nothing. We get educated (not much in my case, left school at fourteen when dad walked out) and guided along the way. We listen to advice and observe influences. Some good some not. And we waste years having to learn for ourselves and making our own mistakes on knowledge that could have been in said manual. Mind it would be some huge book. 

Jeez! That's a bit heavy. My apologies. Think the heat's getting to the old brain cell.  

 

[Tango]

True though Davy so no apologies needed in my view.

 

[Iron Giant]

Pleased we decided to have no kids and have always had a dog for the last 19 years, we both agree that our married life has been a great deal easier without kids. 

 

[spruce]

Pleased we decided to have no kids and have always had a dog for the last 19 years, we both agree that our married life has been a great deal easier without kids. 

Both son and daughter didn't want children. (This doesn't reflect very well on us and the way we brought them up as parents, but both my nephews are bachelors and don't want kids either.) Son and daughter in law have been married since 2003 and she was quite happy to not have any kids. But her father continually nagged her for some grandchildren. Then DIL was diagnosed with MS and was told by the specialist that if she wanted children she should have them sooner rather than later.

Having two kids when he didn't want them just seems to have pushed him over the edge mentally. He feels he has been manipulated into having children when they agreed as a condition to them marrying they wouldn't have children. What makes it worse for him is that she still works full time but he gets to take the kids to school, collect them, fed them, do their homework, etc. He seems to have the stay at home father's role when he didn't sign up for this.

He just doesn't seem to be able to adjust his thinking that sometimes concessions have to be made for reasons you didn't know before. But he just doesn't seem to be able to adjust to a new set of circumstances.

At one time he was enthusiastic about cleaning windows. He was earning more working 6 hours a day cleaning windows for 3 days a week than he was earning 5 full days a week in a warehouse.

We often did a street together by him starting at the top using his van and me starting at the bottom with my van and we would meet in the middle. 

But now he just seem depressed. Doctors gave him anti depressant tablets which didn't help him - just made his mood worse. I don't understand his depression. He never seems depressed if he is doing something he likes. To me a depressed person will be depressed no matter what.

 

[Incheck]

I think it’s very hard for fathers (and mothers) in this day & age. The media and do gooders have not helped. A father figure to me leads by example and instills old school discipline, the way my father did.

If i put a foot wrong he would put the fear of God in to me, i would end up with a sore rear end or a clip round the ear if i stepped out of line. Not in a mean way, e.g. bad school grades or anything, as i did try my best. just if i was being a dennis basically (naughty)

he worked all his life apart from 18 months because of a broken knee cap at the age of 42. He was told he would be in a wheelchair by 60. Many would have given up then and gone on benefits for the rest of their lives but he didnt he carried on for another two decades until he took early retirement on health grounds last year. His body just couldnt cope any more. Like all fathers/grandfathers before us on both sides of the family the work ethic has always been strong. Farmers, sheep sheerers, printers, marine mechanics, civil servants. all walks of trades, so i knew what was expected of me from the start. (Not to be a lazy one basically)

nowadays the type of father i love for making me who i am is frowned upon for being outdated and victorian, its all about being soft now, molly coddling etc. And of course everyones now terrified of being labelled as a child beater etc etc. Now the world wonders why kids struggle in the real world and why you cant get a days work out of them. Blame modern times and parenting. Its not the parents fault at all they want to be accepted by society and other parents, which sadly means being a softy. Kids run rings around their parents now and the parents are helpless. And they wonder why male suicide is so high ? 

 

[Part Timer]

I'm a dinosaur on all fronts. I don't take time off work, as long as I'm physically capable of moving, and pain, in my mind is manageable. The biggest problem we have is big government saying no matter what you do we will support you. There is very little incentive for anyone to push themselves and improve their lives. 

 

[Incheck]

I'm a dinosaur on all fronts. I don't take time off work, as long as I'm physically capable of moving, and pain, in my mind is manageable. The biggest problem we have is big government saying no matter what you do we will support you. There is very little incentive for anyone to push themselves and improve their lives. 

They’ve got us by the belt buckle on all fronts, all they’re interested in is keeping people “in the middle” they don’t want you so poor that they’ve gotta hand it to you but they don’t want you so rich that you pose a threat to their system. The more you earn the more they tax you etc. 

As long as youre working thats all theyre really interested in. Keeps the masses out of mischief because we’re all so distracted with work, time flies by while they screw the country up piece by piece, themselves & the people at the top who fund their campaigns dont have to worry because theyre so well off to start with theyll be fine whatever the outcome. The divide between rich and poor is massive. 

 

[Part Timer]

It's a mindset to me. The biggest problem to the working class is the minimum wage. I know there's plenty on here that will justify it. What I don't understand is that the very same people left employment because of it and then try and justify it. 

 

[Tango]

Keeps the masses out of mischief because we’re all so distracted with work, time flies by while they screw the country up piece by piece, themselves & the people at the top who fund their campaigns dont have to worry because theyre so well off to start with theyll be fine whatever the outcome.

I keep wondering why on earth they do it? Whatever party is in power they seem to be determined to sink our country to even lower levels of desperation. Why? Whats the grand plan that the royals have put in place? - They seem to be the only ones who are actually in control - all the political parties make all sorts of promises and then carry on just like the last lot.

 

[Incheck]

Aye retirement age goes up & up, people have been done out of thousands on their pensions. Its bad.

Whatever happens the power of the people is now very diminished...think back to the russian revolution of 1917. People had just had enough. 

If there was a revolution in this day & age they’ed probably have all the participants up on “terror” charges. The media love to put things in our head to try and brainwash us. What would guy fawkes be labelled as in this day & age i wonder ?the armed services would probably be called in & with all the drones and technology now, any genuine uprising would probably be crunched in to biscuit crumbs in no time. We are absolutely powerless you can either laugh or cry, neither will get us anywhere ?‍ Just crack on & enjoy the time we have...

 

[Iron Giant]

Both son and daughter didn't want children. (This doesn't reflect very well on us and the way we brought them up as parents, but both my nephews are bachelors and don't want kids either.) Son and daughter in law have been married since 2003 and she was quite happy to not have any kids. But her father continually nagged her for some grandchildren. Then DIL was diagnosed with MS and was told by the specialist that if she wanted children she should have them sooner rather than later.

Having two kids when he didn't want them just seems to have pushed him over the edge mentally. He feels he has been manipulated into having children when they agreed as a condition to them marrying they wouldn't have children. What makes it worse for him is that she still works full time but he gets to take the kids to school, collect them, fed them, do their homework, etc. He seems to have the stay at home father's role when he didn't sign up for this.

He just doesn't seem to be able to adjust his thinking that sometimes concessions have to be made for reasons you didn't know before. But he just doesn't seem to be able to adjust to a new set of circumstances.

At one time he was enthusiastic about cleaning windows. He was earning more working 6 hours a day cleaning windows for 3 days a week than he was earning 5 full days a week in a warehouse.

We often did a street together by him starting at the top using his van and me starting at the bottom with my van and we would meet in the middle. 

But now he just seem depressed. Doctors gave him anti depressant tablets which didn't help him - just made his mood worse. I don't understand his depression. He never seems depressed if he is doing something he likes. To me a depressed person will be depressed no matter what.

I don't think it reflects bad on you both at all, as adults we make choices of our own, it's totally the norm for most people to have kids and yet a whole load of people shouldn't have had kids, because to me it seems in the last 20 years it's become the normal thing once they are in a relationship they say ooh lets have a baby then you have 3 kids with different parents, my wife and I want an easy life without hassle and be free to do what we want at anytime, I sacked off 6 jobs yesterday and we went wild swimming and had a great day together.

financial pressures also come into play and keeping up with the Jones new cars, branded clothes, phones holidays etc these were never really things that were relevant as much as they are now because back then we all had nowt near enough were as these days lots more people have money and tv and social media shove it in your face also, if you can blank out most of trash including small minded people and live in your own bubble then things we have found are easier, as for the depression I can be outwardly happy but struggling inside and a good day is a good day, but it can easily all come back and flood my thoughts at a guess your son maybe similar to me in how he is affected.

 

[steve garwood]

Jeez. Feeling a bit hungover and ropey this morning, but coming on here has cheered me up no end ?

 

[Incheck]

Jeez. Feeling a bit hungover and ropey this morning, but coming on here has cheered me up no end ?

3 weeks till the footy season Steve 3 weeks. Match of the day solves all

 

[steve garwood]

3 weeks till the footy season Steve 3 weeks. Match of the day solves all

Not 3 weeks mate, next Saturday the lions are at home to Preston.

Ten o clock breakfast in the Pie mash, then into borough market for ?, then into the den.

Isn’t life marvellous ?

 

[Incheck]

Not 3 weeks mate, next Saturday the lions are at home to Preston.

Ten o clock breakfast in the Pie mash, then into borough market for ?, then into the den.

Isn’t life marvellous ?

Wow is it that soon times passing me by. I don’t think arsenal have made many signings ? need some fresh bodies in badly. 

Darts has kept me occupied for the time being, got really in to it in the last year don’t know why i haven’t been watching it for years it’s pretty cool

 

[Incheck]

Wahay just checked 2 new signings ? get the flags out!

 

[ks789]

yeh ive been studying the upcoming footy for my accumulator. I do them every week. do about 10 or so matches to win 100k or so. Usually there will be at least a couple of draws so, its tricky. ive found apart from ya man city/liverpool its been more unpredictable than ever. havent had the big win yet, closest i was one result off of 30k. This time next year rodders  :1f911:

 

[Pjj]

It's a mindset to me. The biggest problem to the working class is the minimum wage. I know there's plenty on here that will justify it. What I don't understand is that the very same people left employment because of it and then try and justify it. 

Sadly the minimum wage is good for  employers and bad for employees, but when some of us become employers minimum wage is good thing ?? for our buisness . 

 

[Incheck]

Is there really much benefit to employing... the costs seem astronomical for the amount of stress. Paroll, NI, training, equipment, uniforms, pension, employers liability, holiday pay, the compassionate leave, the sickies, the wondering “is so and so gonna show up today, if so on time or are they gonna do a good job?” Then youve always got it in the back of your mind are they fiddling or looking to move on themselves. Even though you people may get to come off the tools yourself by having staff you must simply spend all eternity farting around trying to keep them happy, occupied, the paperwork and schedules x y’s and z’s. Like, how do small/medium size businesses make a profit and stand the stress of it all? It really wonders me how people make it work there must be some very clued up strong willed people out there running these shows because from the outside it looks like one easy way to burn big gigantic hole in ones pocket. And thats why i dont think we’ll ever employ.

what happens when youve got 2 guys phone in sick or something and sent 40 reminder texts out between the pair of them, do you then text 40 customers and postpone the rounds or does muggins running the show have to get back on the tools and somehow try and pick up the slack?!